Final Testimony

As missionaries we are often asked to share our "final testimony" with people as we are departing to go home. Well this is my last day as a full-time missionary serving the Lord Jesus Christ, so I want to share my final testimony with all of you.

When I grew up as a teen I went through all the motions and did everything a good Mormon girl was supposed to do. I attended every Sunday and did all my assignments. But then in college I started to realize I didn't know what I believed. I didn't know if everything I have been told all my life was actually true or if I would get to the other side and God would say "well, you were definitely working hard, but you didn't have to work that hard." It scared me.

My junior year I knew there was a change coming, I could feel some big change coming on the horizon, I just wasn't sure what it would be. I changed majors, and that didn't fulfill it. I dated a few guys, and that didn't fulfill it. But then I started to realize that I did know I believed in God, and that I had never really consulted Him on my life decisions. So I decided to. And boy was I surprised. He told me to serve a Mormon mission. And at the same time, a dear family member was diagnosed with heart failure and given 6 months to live. I realized it was time to decide to know what I did and didn't believe in when it came to religion. So I started praying even harder and begging for answers. And the answer kept coming as Mormon mission. So I went forward on a path I didn't understand. 

And boy has that mission taught me a few things.

Jesus Christ lives. 

God is our Father. He loves us.

The Church of Jesus Christ is the Kingdom of God on the earth.

The Book of Mormon is the most true book on the earth I have ever read and I love it. 

Baptism is the greatest gift God has given all of us to be forgiven of our sins.

There is no place I'd rather be on a Sunday than at the Church.

Jesus Christ lives.

Jesus Christ loves us. 

Jesus Christ suffered and died not just to pay for sin, but to understand our pain when we suffer. 

And this the point I want to leave burned into your hearts like it is in mine. Christ loves you and I more than either of us can ever imagine. He has helped me through the the hardest and darkest hours of my life. I cannot say that my mission has not been a struggle. I have depression and sometimes it's not the easiest. But He has rescued me from every dark moment and showed so much love to me. I know that without a doubt that He will rescue any soul who reaches out to Him. And I know that I am a member of His restored gospel. I want this blessing for all of you. If you are a member, take it a little more serious today. If you aren't, ask the missionaries. I want you to have the joy that this gospel has brought me the past two years as I have served the Lord. I have come to know Him better than I ever thought possible. I have come to understand His love for us more than I ever have and want to spend the rest of eternity in the arms of that love. And I want that for you too. So will you get a Book of Mormon today and read it? Pray about it? Please? I know it will bring you a peace you've never felt and you will be filled with His love for you.

I know it.

Sunsets are never permanent

The other day my companion and I were once again discovering how very fallible my gps is out in the country of Georgia. We were completely lost and were just following the road we were on until it got us to a major road or it ended. At one point we broke out of the heavy trees and turned down a road to discover this. A beautiful Georgia sunset. The bright explosion of light was magnificent. The picture does not do justice to the bright and beautifully colored sky we were looking at. The thing that was disappointing to me was that this show of beauty would not last. The sun was setting and soon darkness would set in. 

Long ago there was another sunset that came with much grieving. The death of our Savior Jesus Christ. He was the "light of the world" (John 8:12). And the brilliance and beauty of His ministry truly did light the world. But He was rejected and His ministry had a sunset of its own. The light of the world was put out and for a time the people of the earth experienced the long night of the apostasy. Many searched for the light but could not find it. Many good men and women during this time would speak out and find light in their own way. But it was still not the same. It would be equivalent to me turning on a lamp and saying "see, the sun is up!" Yes, there is light, but it is definitely not the light of the sun. And very similarly the light of the Son was missing. 

But God, our Father, loved all of us far too much to permanently leave us without the light of His Son. And just like a true sunrise, there was a brightness that signified the coming of the return of the light of the Son. In early American history it is recorded to be a great time of religious excitement. Many preachers traveled from city to city asking the big question "Are you saved?" and many people began to wonder if they were. A young boy asked that question for himself. In Ephesians it states "One Lord, one faith, one baptism." (Eph 4:5) As he continued to study he found in the writings of James the path to his answer. It states "If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God..." (James 1:5) And so he did. He asked. And of his experience he said "I saw a pillar of light exactly over my head, above the brightness of the sun, which descended gradually until it fell upon me...When the light rested upon me I saw two Personages, whose brightness and glory defy all description, standing above me in the air. One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and said, pointing to the other—This is My Beloved Son. Hear Him!" The light of the Son was literally and physically reintroduced to the world. 

I testify that this really happened. The Light is back. His church that He established himself 2000 years ago has been restored and this light and truth is available to any who honestly seek with an open heart. And the even greater news is that the Light will never be lost again. The Lord has promised it. And He never breaks His promises. 

He Atoned

I've been thinking a lot recently about something dear to my heart. In the beginning of my mission there was a phrase that drove me crazy. Whenever I had a hard day, felt guilty about something I said or did, felt sick other missionaries would tell me "Study the Atonement." This always made me crazy! I couldn't see how Christ's sacrifice applied to me being sick. It frustrated me that others would think that it applied. I felt that it only applied when we were repenting of sin.

I continued on in my mission with great frustration trying to understand how the Atonement applied to the situation I was in. But I tried their advice and studied the Atonement. And at first it did not work. I still couldn't see how the Atonement would help me feel better when people reject the message that we share. Then last April I studied the atonement in a new way. I read a talk by David A. Bednar, an Apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ, speaking on the enabling power of the Atonement. It completely changed my understanding. I then read in the book Jesus the Christ and studied the last week of Christ's life to prepare to give a talk in church on Easter Sunday. And my understanding of my Savior and my relationship with Him was revolutionized.

Over the following months as I continued to study the Atonement I came closer and closer to my Savior. In the Fall I had some experiences that brought me closer to Him than I ever thought possible. So I have decided that I need to share my testimony and understanding of the Atonement. I plan to do a series of posts over the coming weeks sharing and teaching on the many different aspects of the Atonement and how it applies to every moment of every day of our lives.

I know that as we come to truly understand the purpose of Christ's love for us and His sacrifice because of that love that we can be blessed immeasurably. I pray that this understanding can help you as it has helped me.

Zebras Can Change Their Stripes

The other day I was thinking about the phrase people use: "zebras can't change their stripes." Most of the time I feel we use this as an excuse for why we don't improve ourselves and work to be a better person. We tell ourselves "well I can't change my stripes, so why even try?" But really, we can!

I have an obsession with zebra stripes. I'm not quite sure where or how it started. I think it was early on in my mission when I saw that one of my teaching companions had zebra striped sheets. And it was all downhill from there. I love the pattern so much and have shoes, scarves, bags, and whatever I can find that has zebra stripes on it.


Recently my mission president said "This is the Gospel of change!" That got me so excited! It really is! Through Jesus Christ we can change! We can become more! And zebras really can change their stripes. The Atonement is for everyone. President David O. McKay said “The purpose of the gospel is … to make bad men good and good men better, and to change human nature.” CHANGE! Oh how I love that word. It sounds so attainable. There is a magic word that is described as so in the Bible Dictionary, "The Greek word of which this is the translation denotes a change of mind, i.e., a fresh view about God, about oneself, and about the world." That sounds so easy! Well that word is Repentance. Something that greatly intimidates many of us. It seems like such an insurmountable task sometimes. Some may feel that they just can't make all the changes necessary. I used to feel that way, it wasn't until I found this explanation of repentance that I realized that I could do it and it wouldn't hurt too much.

A change of heart is a powerful thing. It means more than just quitting whatever we are doing. It means that we come to realize how wrong that thing is. We desire to be more, we desire to change. There is a group of people in the Book of Mormon that show that change. Of their experience it states "And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God..." (Mosiah 4:2) These people desired to be purified and change. We can all do this!

I know that through the Atonement of Jesus Christ that we really can change! I have personally been changed so much by the Gospel of Jesus Christ. It blesses my life every day. I get to be in the business of change helping others see that it is possible for them to be more than they are now. Zebras really can change their stripes.